Getting my groove on in life and in leopard

by byanika on 02/06/2011 · 86 comments

in By Anika,leopard,self worth,stripes

 Hi Sweethearts!

Do you know that feeling of getting your mojo on in life? I am 32 and I finally feel that I am on a roll. This is evident in my fashion, in how often I laugh, in how often I do dance offs with my self in a mirror, in how many times a day I think kind thoughts about my self.

You may think I am just a late bloomer, and in a way maybe I am, but that is not the whole story. As you know I am an honest person, in my blogging, in my fashion, in my life. I have spent my life so far surviving and overcoming abuse that I was subjected to growing up. I survived largely thanks to my mum who has fought fiercely for me every step of the way, but also because I always had a voice inside of me whispering sweet promises of the woman I have become today.

I have survived by challenging and redefining every negative perception of my self, perceptions I had internalized to the point where they became my truth, nearly drowning out the whisper inside me.

As I battled my depression, anxeity and self harming I became aware of how detached my truth about my self and the reality of who I am was:

I felt like a failure every time I failed at something. Today I just try again.

I thought I would always be lonely. Today I dare to reach out. I am often the helper, but I also dare to accept help.

I was told I was so ugly that others were uncomfortable being in my presence. As it turns out, this is not true. I am at a place today where I can accept a compliment without believing the one complimenting me to be ridiculing me.

I was ashamed to be curvy. I was ashamed to have ugly feet and hands. Today I can look at my self in a mirror and be happy about my rack, and be ok with my wide hips. I am wearing red nailpolish for the first time in my life.                                                                        

I grieved that I was undesirable as a woman. Now I feel sensual every day. Can you handle this jelly?

I believed that I should remove my self from this world, or at least be invisible. As I reclaimed my self worth this was mirrored in my fashion. Hello leopard/stripes/colour. Hello fashionblogging!

I felt I was responsible for my uglyness. Today I know I am responsible for my happiness.

So, here I am today. I know who I am. I keep centering my self. I am at peace. I am happy to be me, for the first time in my life. I keep moving forward, walking through my fears, dreaming bigger, chosing to feel hopeful about my future.

What is next, you may wonder? I`ll tell you what is next for me.

I am getting my groove ON! In loud prints. Damn right.

The oufit: I sewed this dress this morning. It is made from a scarf, a top and a dress. I wanted to sew something discreet and proper, and I am rather pleased with the result. (Bling, H&M and TopShop. Sandals, Skopunkten)

 

Tell me my friends, how are you getting your groove on in your own life and fashion?

 

 I would love to connect with you!

 anikack@gmail.com   @AnikaByAnika   Facebook

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